What You Should Know About Live Records

A few months ago the editor of another music website commissioned me to write a piece on Live Albums. He gave me a list of 10 rock albums amongst which were popular rock releases by Kiss, Thin Lizzy, and Judas Priest.  I was supposed to pick one I had in my collection and analyze it in depth.  Halfway through the list I came to the realization that I, in fact, did not own any of them.  Actually, after briefly perusing through my record collection I realized that indeed I owned zero live albums.  There are many reasons for this. The main one being that they are a farce. Live albums are not real. Or at least most of them are not.  They do not truly recreate the live experience, that’s for sure, and in some instances they don't even represent the exact performance.  In rare instances, when they do recreate the live experience, they blow at all sonic levels. Case in point, I was just listening to that Gomez live album (Out West) recorded at San Francisco's Fillmore auditorium but the sound was so lame I felt the urge to write this piece.  Here are a few reasons why live albums suck:

People buy live albums because they want to know what it was like to be there.  Perhaps they missed the last time Aerosmith hit town and they want to hear what it was like to hear five sober and wrinkled sixty year somethings playing songs about dreaming on. Or maybe they weren't alive and living in England when The Who recorded Live at Leeds.  Truth of the matter is the grand majority of live albums do not accurately represent what a live show truly is, therefore someone does not get any closer to the experience just by listening to them.  When someone attends a concert, the music is only part of the show. Visuals, bloated alcohol prices, bullies, annoying drunks, fights, stinky sluts, sweat and the overall interaction -wanted and unwanted- with the public and the artists obviously enhance the experience. With live albums you get none of the above.

Some people want to re-live the memory. We all know someone who saw (or someone who knows someone who saw) The Beatles back when they first invaded the US or who got to see Sepultura back on their first American tour on support of Beneath the Remains.  By buying a live recording of such or such tour one can drift back to a happy time and positions himself/herself as taking an active role in a moment of history.  It kind of brings to mind that saying; ‘any old time was a better time’, and that’s lame.

Studio recordings are usually mistake-free, but live shows are inherently inundated with fuck-ups.   Bands make mistakes left and right (in the case of Kiss is more like left and right and up and down) and in most instances this makes for a spontaneous and real experience.  With the excuse of wanting to give fans their money’s worth most - not all - bands head back to the studio and fix all these ‘minor glitches’ making the live album only half live. Or perhaps mostly dead.

If you have a gimmick (like Kiss) and your music sucks (like Kiss), then chances are you are going to the see them live as much for the music as for the pyrotechnics, the million dollar show, or the hidden hope of seeing Ace Freehley spontaneously combusting into a puff of smoke.  So what’s the point of a Kiss live album besides milking the public like they are cows? Plus, haven’t you heard “I Wanna Rock and Roll All Night” enough? The song reeks.

Despite advancements in technology, records still do not replicate the live sound. Regardless of the efforts placed on keeping shit ‘raw’, not even turning the fucker up to 11 will replicate the vibrancy of a real live show. In other words, live albums are as much fun as a fucking Pink Floyd light show.

Live records are usually just one more way to squeeze money out of you.  In an effort to re-package the same stuff over and over (Best of’s, Greatest Hits and Anniversary re-issues are three others) record labels found in live releases the perfect excuse to milk you just a little harder.

There is only one instance in which live records are acceptable merchandise; bands like The Grateful Dead and The Dave Matthews Band did/do their best to consistently offer up a different and spontaneous show on a night by night basis.   This approach to touring keeps their shows fresh for both musicians and fans alike. And this is especially the case with bands like the Dead where a bunch of brain deads followed them around for weeks, purchasing anything the band was willing to sell.  Also, bands like these make tons of cash by issuing these so-called bootlegs and selling them to suckers. Either way is a loss. And if you actually dig either one of those bands then you deserve the punishment and to go broke anyway.

And last but not least…

You weren't there so face reality and suck it in. A live record is not going to make a difference.

I got back to my editor a couple of days later. I informed him that I did not own any of the albums in his list and proposed instead the idea of writing a piece on why live albums blow a hairy one. He said it was an interesting idea and to keep it in the back of my mind, that we'd get back to it a little later.  It's been about a year and a half since then and I am still waiting…