Make Yourself Up
With Lockjaw Records
METAL REISSUES GALORE XIV
Cerebral Fix, Tank,
Satan, Silver Mountain, Acid Drinkers & More.
TALES FROM THE CUTOUT BIN
Malevolent Creation, Fatal Embrace & More.
METAL REISSUES GALORE XIII
War Hammer, Blind
Fury, Destroyers, Subhumans & More.
RETRO METAL SQUARE OFF
Havok, White Wizzard,
Cauldron, Lazarus AD & More.
A JOLLY NIGHT WITH NAPALM
Monks, Hatesphere, Fairyland & More.
THE GOOD THE BAD THE
Ethereal Dirge, Old Timer & More.
METAL REISSUES GALORE XII
Brutality, Mortification, Diamond Head & More.
A JOYFUL NIGHT WITH
Dodsferd, I Shalt
Become, Horna, Azaghal, Necronoclast & More.
TALES FROM THE
The Hidden Hand,
Wurdulak, Gobblehoof, Insult II Injury, Master & More.
Mortification, Rigor Mortis, Chronical Diarrhoea & More.
Illapa, Necrosis, Mystifier & More.
RICH HOAK - TFD
Scene: Awesome Bands From
Leviathan, Defecation, Tusk, etc.
Unseen Force, Impulse Mansluaghter, Slaughter, etc.
Arizona: Desert Oasis or
An Ideological Autopsy
New York City Report
Yourself Up With Lockjaw!
Records is a UK based label that was formed by three
brothers back in 1997. Amongst the labelís first
releases were recordings by Zen Guerrilla and Unsane.
However judging by their current roster, their target
market seems to have shifted substantially. The labelís
site states that is their aim to release 'new raw
talent'. That sounds about right. Several of their
bands show potential. Unrealized potential that may just
come of age when the time is right. For now some of
these bands seem greener than the grass of Wembley
Stadium. Read on and spread the word...
Maeven reminds me of a poppier, bubblegummy and
punkified version of Skunk Anansie. That may just be
because vocalist Becca Towler leads her pack with the
same bold panache that Skin used to lead her trio. Or it
may just be because some of the tunes in this debut
posses that FM-ready alt-rock radio friendliness that
differentiated Skunk Anansie in an era of insipid music.
I tell you what I like about Maeven, they donít have
great songs. In fact they donít have any great songs,
but they got the energy and this recording is relentless
in its intent. So much so, you can sense their
admiration for rockers like the Backyard Babies. It is
surprising then to find out that this is an all-girl
teenage quartet. As is the issue with most teenage
bands, Maeven are still quite green and that seeps
through their songwriting and arrangements. At moments,
I seriously thought I was listening to Barbie Rocker,
but hey, give Maeven time and who knows what theyíll
understand that this type of music is all the hype these
days, but I donít like it. There are literally hundreds
of bands that sound and look just like these kids. I
donít know what the charm is. Even worse, when Three
Years Hiding says they play post hardcore emo I wonder
where the hardcore is. Because this bland debut, We
Lost Ourselves and Found Our Way To This has zero
hardcore. Itís all weepy lyrics and wimpy music. And
donít even get me started with the vocals; they are
generic as fuck. Anyway, I think Iíve seen the lads from
Three Years Hiding hanging out at the shopping mall. In
fact, I think they are being cloned, because Iíve seen
hundreds of them, everywhere. With their girl jeans, big
earrings, skinny frames, girly demeanor, and else. Not
that there is anything wrong with it. No. Far from it.
Eight Page Pullout donít waste anytime sucking. ĎWow,
wow, wowí starts off the first song ďStand UpĒ and
boy if you ought to get ready for a blizzard of horrible
emo rock. There is nothing but terrible melodies, shitty
playing, generic hard rock moments, laughable vocal
harmonies and probably the same vocalist from Three
Years Hiding. There is absolutely nothing good about
this EP. Surprisingly, Eight Page Pullout have been
together for over seven years. After realizing that the
only question I have is, did they learn anything during
such a long time? Because really Stand Up, is
absolutely horrible and sounds like something that was
written by mongoloid twelve year olds. But there are
good news after all, Eight Page Pullout broke up
recently. Thanks for the wise decision lads!
two atrocious records I come to I Killed Pharaoh with
some expectations. The reason being that I kinda like
the cover artwork. Besides, thatís a better moniker than
I Killed the Prom Queen.
King-Hell Breakthrough is far from being a great
album, but compared to whatever Eight Page Pullout are
capable of delivering, this sounds Pulitzer Prize
worthy. I Killed Pharaoh occasionally sounds like a
lightweight Deftones, but thatís only when the bassist
is not playing some funk-slapping, and when the rest of
the band isnít trying to pull some modern rock tricks,
like during ďSubstanceĒ where the band mixes organic alt
rock with programming. The result ainít half bad.
Overall, the music is solid. It just needs more focus,
fine tune the song writing and I Killed Pharaoh could
have something worth $10 in their hands.
Tribute to Nothing are far from being my cup of tea, but
their delivery is assured and professional, their
songwriting is fluid and concise, their songs are
memorable and though not totally removed from emo band
camp, they pack a wallop like few in their field. More
importantly, their vocalist doesnít sound like a total
idiot wearing a white leather belt and weeping at the
sight of his boyfriend walking away at the hand of his
best friend. Breathe How You Want to Breathe
features great dynamics and a matured sound thatís
obviously the result of hard work and experience as a
band. The first half is thoroughly solid, with jarring
tunes that lyrically donít stray away from introspection
and conflict and that musically are nicely textured and
surprisingly jagged and angular. The second half of the
album is lackluster. Especially the last three tunes,
which had they been left out would have made this album
boy, you only need to take a look at the cover picture
of San Andreas' Man or Monster to realize that
you may just be about to be caressed and pummeled at the
same time by the very annoying sounds of screamo. Yeah,
apparently the plague isnít over yet. Or if it is, no
one told these kids. San Andreas are a modern band, with
a modern sound thatís formed by lots of fluffy melodies,
a bit of crappy zero attitude hardcore and plenty of
erratic screams. Somehow, thatís come to launch a
movement of shopping mall dwellers. To their credit, the
vocalist whose name is Sopo or something like that, has
a belligerent scream, which is good thing by the way.
His clean vocals do not necessarily bother me, but the
choruses are hideous. Totally generic. Especially
manufactured by a band with apparently no interest to
picked this last CD basically because this band has the
worst name in history. I mean Parties Break Hearts?
Couldnít they have thought of something better?
Something like Purulence, Mayhem, Backstreet Boys or
Destinyís Child. Or how about some other universal truth
like, Crappy Music Breaks Hearts or Horrible Songs Breed
Stupid People? The funny thing in this album is that it
has one groove laden riff thatís perfect to make all the
morons bounce like basketballs, and of course this Swiss
quartet plays it like in every other song. This album is
titled Life is Too Short to Dance With Ugly People
and if that proves to be a rule at parties, these dudes
wonít have any options but to make out between each