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This
band has been unwrapped, bitten and chewed for a long
while. It has been extracted off all its color and
flavor and then it has been spat out onto this CD. What
is registered here is mild, tepid, stale, totally void
of creativity and utterly forgettable. It is the kind of
stuff that is found in the editing room floor. Other
ways to refer to the music included in this first
full-length from this Canadian thrash metal band would
be to say that it is generic, that it sounds copied,
that its unoriginality is actually remarkable. Yes,
being this bad kinda takes talent.
I think
about that shit all the time. Like when I watch a really awful
movie (anything with Rob Schneider for instance) and all I can
think about is how difficult it must be to actually make a good
movie. That’s what I think about when I hear the songs from
Death’s River. Boy, even the shittiest Testament record and
Exodus’ horrid Force of Habit are masterpieces worthy of the Louvre compared to this record.
Arkayic
Revolt is led by Darryl Fletcher and he needs help. He sings,
plays bass and guitars and truthfully he doesn’t excel at any.
His riffs were a thing of the past in 1993. Now they sound a bit
like a bad joke that shuffles punchlines until it finds a laugh.
He can play, his solos are OK (and the one on “Cohesive
Disembodiment” is actually close to great), but knowing how to
play doesn’t mean you know how to write a good song. And that’s
what this band needs, a talented songwriter.
And to be
frank, Fletcher’s voice ain’t all that bad either. In a genre
known for the mediocrity of its vocalists, Fletcher can at least
find comfort in his bitter grunt. The problem is he doesn’t know
himself and so he sings. He tries to carry melodies in the
second track “From Hell” and the result is disastrous. To
adhere completely to the old thrash template Arakyic Revolt
crowns each song with gang vocals. Sure thing, this band isn’t
striving for originality but do you have to check every box?
Somehow I
get the feeling that I have heard all these songs before and
yet, I know that I am new to Death’s River.
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