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California \ classic metal \ hair metal \ heavy metal \ hells headbangers \ Marc Schoenbach \ not pussy \ Pounder \ Sadist Art Designs
Pounder – Uncivilized (Badass Period Heavy Metal)
I can't remember the last time I reviewed heavy metal. Unlike thrash, which you still feel totally badass for listening to, heavy metal can lack that effect outside of its original context, that is, the olden times. It has a tendency to feel more dated than Satanic imagery in metal at large. Oh shit […]
-ess \ Adele Mildred \ Deadlight Records \ doom metal \ Fiend \ Paris \ psychedelic rock \ sludge
Fiend – Seeress (Doompth Metal)
Yo I just came up with a new term: "doompth metal." At first read that sounds horrible, like a new taunt. You doompthus! That, another new word, is definitely a taunt, but doompth is not, sometimes. Okay let me be honest here it kind of is. Truth be told it's all I could come […]
Besta – Eterno Rancor (Crust Metal Capitalism)
Yet another example of a book judged properly by its banking account. Marco Donida probably listened to Eterno Rancor as many times as I did, because I myself certainly thought of crucified snake Jesuses, a meth lab with a floating brain, a skeleton sycophant wading in toxic waste and refugee vomit with a bayoneted […]
Back from the Grave Tapes \ experimental metal \ Hypnotic Dirge Records \ impressionistic \ Kuba Kujawa \ lady got me pre \ Omgeving \ post-metal \ prog-metal \ The Netherlands
Omgeving – Wijde Wijdte (Honestly Impressionistic Metal)
Now here's a guy who knows exactly what he's about all...the...time. Honestly not sure I do, however. Look at that cover by Polish tatoo artist Kuba Kujawa. Seriously look at it. Do you know what's going on there? You might think so at first. Now the band name, Omgeving, is Dutch for "surroundings" and […]
Corpse Flower Records \ Great Falls \ hardcore \ Init Records \ post-hardcore \ prefix attack \ Seattle \ so much un \ Throatruiner Records
Great Falls – A Sense of Rest (Post-Prefix Hardcore)
There was something to this one I couldn't find the adjectives to explain, and then it came to me, just choose a prefix or two, though I'll focus on "un." Unengaging, ungood, see how easy? Let me explain further so it's more unclear. Post-hardcore goes in one of two directions: interesting or uninteresting. The […]
Black Viper \ Dying Victims Productions \ High Roller Records \ Norway \ power metal \ speed metal \ wow they did it
Black Viper – Hellions of Fire (Woah You Guys Do Power and/or Speed Metal?)
Sheah, we do power metal and/or speed metal on occasion. Got a problem with the gap in reviews? Huh? Deal with it (sunglasses drop), because most of it sucks hard. Too old school and/or not enough modern bite. Unlike thrash, which the majority of us can give a pass to regardless of how old […]
hardcore punk \ heavy metal \ Philadelphia \ punk \ punkened thrash \ Roadkiller \ thrash metal \ wow no bass WTF
Roadkiller – S/T (One-Guitar Biker Punk)
I was immediately drawn to the cover of this EP, because, um, look now, skeleton thing and it's riding a motorcycle whilst wielding a chain. And it's riding over skeletons. I mean basically it's some Ghost Rider shit without breaking copyright law, but this album most certainly breaks the law(s) in another way. Thought […]
blackened death metal \ Mark Riddick \ Memento Mori \ Mexico \ Morbid Messiah \ self-raping corpse rape \ Unholy Prophecies
Morbid Messiah – Demoniac Paroxysm (So Messy)
This is one of those releases where you know exactly what you're in for yet it cleverly hides its filth so it passes Facebook censorship with flying colors. Note, for example, the torn, nude corpse at the bottom. I can guarantee their stupid scraper won't notice it even though nipple shots are a no-go. […]
20 Buck Spin \ California \ HP Lovecraft \ Ian Miller \ Jesus fucking Lovecraft AGAIN \ Lovecraftian bullshit \ post-black metal \ post-death metal \ post-metal
Ulthar – Cosmovore (Lovecraft Does It, Sigh, AGAIN)
Now here's a good one, musically speaking... Thematically it almost killed me with redundancy, which I'll explain, but these guys are so skilled at what they do I could ignore it, mainly because I didn't know what any of it was about until after I listened about 10 times. California's Ulthar are true masters […]
blackened death metal \ Deadtapes \ death metal \ Drawn and Quartered \ Gabriel Byrne \ Krucyator Productions \ like WTF am I looking at \ Seattle \ United States
Drawn and Quartered – The One Who Lurks (WTF Am I Looking At Metal)
Boy did I sit on this one a long time. I mean, yeah, we sit on stuff a long time in general, but this is different because hard copy submissions, provide we will review them in the first place, have always gotten priority. Why you break your own rules? My excuse is I listened […]