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Valais – S/T (Oppressive Occult Black Metal)

Valais – S/T (Oppressive Occult Black Metal)

  Ahhh allow me, and then you, to relax and imbibe in this finely malicious black metal of the occult right here. It already had all the markings of the best of the best of the better best, but the true test, as usual, is beyond the visuals to the sound. Valais, in true modern […]

Bat Magic – Feast of Blood (Vampires Are Cool Again Black Metal)

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Bat Magic – Feast of Blood (Vampires Are Cool Again Black Metal)

  It didn’t surprise me I liked this one. Usually I’d pass on such a simplistic cover with an obvious vampire bent that’s likely to be more kitsch than clique. I mean Jesus Christ it states right there on Bandcamp “RECORDED IN A CASTLE UNDER THE BLOOD MOON ANNO MMXVI.” ALL CAPS too, I didn’t […]

Corrupter – Descent into Madness (That Punishing Type of Death Metal)

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Corrupter – Descent into Madness (That Punishing Type of Death Metal)

  I needed some punishing blows to my soul this week hot damn. I like need more potassium in my body or something and everything is out of whack (very true real-life story). I want to go full beast again so this is my current placebo this week until that becomes a reality, but even […]

HAMMR – Eternal Possession (Swirling Bodies Blackened Speed Punk)

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HAMMR – Eternal Possession (Swirling Bodies Blackened Speed Punk)

  Nasty stuff this one. What can I expect from a guy who played guitar and drums for Demona holy shit? For whatever reason, and I don’t care to ask, he struck it out on his own with this act, HAMMR, right around the same time aforementioned Chilean speed metal harpy girl all but disappeared […]

Silhouette – Les Retranchements (I Get It You Don’t Atmopheric Black Metal)

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Silhouette – Les Retranchements (I Get It You Don’t Atmopheric Black Metal)

  I was trying to understand the hate I saw this debut getting on the onlines but then I remembered most people are idiots and I’m the best at this review thing. To summarize the brief lameness I witnessed, I read that Les Retranchements was lacking focus in its combination of the delicate with the […]

Tormentor Tyrant – S/T (Primordial Hate Metal)

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Tormentor Tyrant – S/T (Primordial Hate Metal)

  Over the years I’ve shortened my review length as more and more people forget how to read. Who reads anymore? But today I’ll be even shorten than usual, because there is little to say. Finland’s Tormentor Tyrant, fresh with only two singles before this EP, have supplied my current need of bestial power sufficiently. […]

Mental Devastation – The Delusional Mystery of the Self Part I (What Thrash is Supposed to Sound Like)

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Mental Devastation – The Delusional Mystery of the Self Part I (What Thrash is Supposed to Sound Like)

  Phew, now this title is sure a fooking mouthful. Maybe that’s why it took me so long to finish this review, I was still reading it lol. Actually, I waited because to be honest most of the December promo pool was absolute garbage. This one came in rather early so I sat on it, […]

Diablery – Candles (Symphonic Greek Black Metal Mastery)

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Diablery – Candles (Symphonic Greek Black Metal Mastery)

  Really didn’t feel like listening to goddamn black metal this month. Don’t know why. Probably the vast number of shitass promos I received. Banal splits. Upside crosses all over the fucking place. Pointy logos. Stupid corpsepaint whateverthefuck. Some shit about snow. Tanks or something I don’t know. Holding swords as if to assault but […]

Charnel Altar – Abatement of the Sun (Vile, Life-Ruining Blackened Death Doom)

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Charnel Altar – Abatement of the Sun (Vile, Life-Ruining Blackened Death Doom)

  Well here’s an album that will turn you into a godforsaken, lowest form of scum. I mean this is just some of the most disgusting shit I’ve heard in awhile. Total garbage liquid. Total vomit feces. Total bile clot. That’s about what Charnel Altar’s latest rot pile is, something like that. Abatement of the […]