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Heads for the Dead – Serpent’s Curse (Super Group Stuff)

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Heads for the Dead – Serpent’s Curse (Super Group Stuff)

  Yeah that's the best I had to describe this one, "super group stuff," because I wanted highlight that when a group is referred to as "super" it often precludes a positive review. You set anything up as so damn super and it's more inevitable it will fail due to its assumption of superiority. Luckily […]

Essenz – Manes Impetus (Pandering Black Metal)

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Essenz – Manes Impetus (Pandering Black Metal)

  Manes Impetus, the latest from Berlin, Germany’s Essenz, is nearly an hour long which is fine if the goal is to produce a musical journey encapsulating the musical anguish of the forebears, artistic sadism, and creative passions. Aesthetic value 10/10, but we don't score like that here whoops. This one progresses through some fairly […]

Woebegone Obscured – The Forestroamer (So EPIC It Goddamn Hurts)

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Woebegone Obscured – The Forestroamer (So EPIC It Goddamn Hurts)

  Just look at that goddamn sick cover. Man, I don't know what in the world a forestroamer is, but I want to be one. I want to be one with the nature and the trees with moss dripping all from me. The artist, Artem Demura, aka Stargrave, was the perfect fit for Woebegone Obscured, […]

Ill Omen – The Grande Usurper (Okkvlt Black Metal Ritvalz)

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Ill Omen – The Grande Usurper (Okkvlt Black Metal Ritvalz)

  Here we have the latest release by occult black metal mystery Ill Omen, who hails from New South Wales, Australia. The Grande Usurper was released on Iron Bonehead Productions, well known for all that is underground kvlt for superior provincials. And if you’re reading this well that’s you, whose expected metal offerings demand the occult and […]

WITCH KING – Voice Of The Ossuary (Another Satan Metal Band)

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WITCH KING – Voice Of The Ossuary (Another Satan Metal Band)

  Sometimes the stupid titles I come up with sound more condescending than they actually are. They're more congenial, at times, like this time. I mean, come on, can't we at least question the Satan thing in metal once in awhile? Just once I'd like to see someone or some band do something a little more […]

Malsanctum – S/T (Two Minutes to Funeral Doom’s Funeral)

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Malsanctum – S/T (Two Minutes to Funeral Doom’s Funeral)

  Well, here it is, likely the first time something from Iron Bonehead Productions actually depresses me in the other way. I prefer the "why does the human race exist?" type of depression, but this is more of a "why was this album released?" sadness. Now, please pause, for I have already started this on an […]

Mandy (2018) (Big Chainsaw Duels Are Cool)

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Mandy (2018) (Big Chainsaw Duels Are Cool)

  Panos Cosmatos is a name that should definitely be known to fans of more off-the-wall cinema. Boosting up an undeniably old-school touch with modern cinematography and sound techniques, the young Canadian director should have been on indie film fans’ radar already his dazzling Beyond the Black Rainbow (2010). In 2018, he’s back again with […]

Kobold – Death Parade (When Will Vintage Thrash Die? Parade)

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Kobold – Death Parade (When Will Vintage Thrash Die? Parade)

  Welcome Serbia’s Kobold and their Death Parade, 15 tracks of ass-blistering, face-melting, dick-scalding, heart-burning, finger-gnashing, teeth-crushing, curb-stomped, methhead speed metal. The things I like about Kolbold’s take on the old is that it doesn’t stray from the path of what has come before.  The cover by Željko Manojlović is very 80’s with those Big Brother, […]

Maligner – Attraction to Annihilation (Everything Should Be Burned)

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Maligner – Attraction to Annihilation (Everything Should Be Burned)

  Lol this is such a goddamn fitting album to review today, it really is. If you're not aware, this site is so apolitical you'll swear off any potential party affiliation or political worldview immediately. Keep that crap out of here, unless it's to start flame wars in the comments so the site gets more hits. […]

Crawl – Rituals (Sweden Does It Again, Basically)

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Crawl – Rituals (Sweden Does It Again, Basically)

  I feel like I've been getting a lot of Swedish metal the past few months. Actually, it's probably more than I've noticed it since it's been pretty damn good in general. I really need to stop with the italics joke, so let's see if I can make it through the rest of this. Really I don't need […]

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