Svalbarduk – One Day All This Will End
I’m a bit confused here. Not sure when this band changed their name from Svalbard to Svalbarduk but when the promo was downloaded from Haulix, it was Svalbard. Their banner is Svalbard, their logo is Svalabard, their Bandcamp page is Svalbard, but their official Facebook band name and URL is Svalbarduk. Do you know the secret? I’m guessing it’s Svalbard (UK), their country of origin, but it doesn’t matter so much. It sure as hell did confuse me before writing this review, though. “Where the fuck did they go? I just saw their page.” You know what isn’t confusing? How I feel about this album. I could compare it to some pizza experiences (and I really want to) but I’ll take a step back from that approach for a bit and try to be more objective and less crude for this review. Besides, I would rather not have another band use my photo as their profile picture in order to mock me because they disagree with my approach.
Svalbarduk are a band from Bristol. Very little info about the name origin out there, other than Svalbard is a Norwegian archipelago and one of the most northern inhabited areas on Earth I guess. You would think that if you name yourself after some Norwegian tundra, you would sound pretty cvld or kvlt but when you decide to play post hardcore, you kind of abandon any real kvlt approaches. What we have here is very post-hardcore, maybe a bit of melodic if you’re picky but hardcore in essence. You get a few blast beats here and there, a few slow-downs, up the female singing gently moments, and a smattering of tasteful aggression. This is a good album to take to the gym and wrench out a fat pump so you can assert your dominance over your fellow gym-goers so they know you are the alpha of your respective gender and that you make decisions for the herd. Cut your leg, rub your blood over your face, and show that you have no fear. Cut out the heart of any opposing groups within your herd and consume their heart to gain their strength. Those who secretly wish to become the alpha will try to learn your secrets and they will find that Svalbarduk dominates your iPod Top 25 Most Played and then will try to usurp you. Tracks such as “The Vanishing Point”, “Unnatural Light”, and “Unrequited”, will stand on top of weaker, non-Svalbarduk tracks.
However, your reliance on Svalbarduk will make you weak. While One Day All This Will End has plenty of moments, there isn’t enough variety within to keep you in control of the herd for so long. Serious, committed deadlifters and squatters will grow in size and strength and push you out. I’d be happier if there were more moments akin to this where you need to open up this fucking pit. With rage in your heart and stomp in your foot, you’ll strike fear in any gym-goer and random bouts of rage will keep your enemies cautious. They’ll never know when you’ll strike them down even if for a small mistake such as forgetting to wipe down the bench after their sweaty, gross fucking ass has been soiling it for the past 15 minutes. Still, objectively One Day All This Will End is worth a listen. I wish there was a bit more variety and heaviness to it but the album still puts up a fight and keeps you entertained and involved. I personally enjoyed it on arms day (hence gym references) and in the Denver airport in my attempt to stay up from 12:30 AM til 7:45 AM for my flight back to Seattle. I’ve seen this album on a few top albums of 2015 and while I don’t necessarily agree it’s a top contender, I understand their thoughts and perspectives on One Day All This Will End.
Written by Cole Olson
Svalbarduk: One Day All This Will End
Bloodsoaked Records, Halo of Flies, Holy Roar Records, Through Love Records
3.8 / 5
