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Rope Sect – The Great Flood (Sentimental Moan Rock)

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Rope Sect – The Great Flood (Sentimental Moan Rock)

  Well I meant to get on this one before release but a tree hit our house so like that was more important I guess. Rope Sect I've heard before and I'm glad to see a furtherance of the band's signature sound of seclusion in this latest sampling of post-punk, quasi-Goth, death rock, moan metal […]

Nosis (Existential Pinocchio Nose Murder by Vincenz Neuhaus)

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Nosis (Existential Pinocchio Nose Murder by Vincenz Neuhaus)

  We need more existential nose fiction in the world. Ever since the great one, Nikolai Gogol, conceived of a living nose tale the world has forever attempted to come out of his nostrils and do better. I am happy to say that quest has finally been completed by +5 to charisma animation paladin Vincenz […]

Lord Vigo – Danse De Noir (Grandiose VHS Doom Metal with Robots)

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Lord Vigo – Danse De Noir (Grandiose VHS Doom Metal with Robots)

  Here's something I've said a lot: "God I hated this at first." Definitely said that here. I see "epic" used with anything, especially doom metal, which already has its own problems with pretension, and I just turn my head away. How dare you guys add epic to that? Are you crazy?! These guys are […]

Lebenssucht – -273​,​15°C (Now I’m Legit Suicidal Black Metal)

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Lebenssucht – -273​,​15°C (Now I’m Legit Suicidal Black Metal)

  Man the pain just bleeds off of the self-inflicted cuts of this one, phew. Proper direction, vertically, along the length of the veins, goddamn... I'm seriously suicidal now, for show at least. Depressive Suicidal Black Metal (DSBM) doesn't get the hype it needs sometimes. Maybe it's too legitimately scary to some, I don't know, […]

SWAN MEAT – FLESH WORLD (MMO and Anime Music But Cool)

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SWAN MEAT – FLESH WORLD (MMO and Anime Music But Cool)

  Man that's a great cover. It's like totally anime and MMO or something, but the good stuff only. So that's one-line intro, or two-line rather, for today because combining anime and MMO music into something worthy of transcending background music is exactly what FLESH WORLD is about. SWAN MEAT I've known for some years […]

Goatblood – Apparition of Doomsday (Satan at Sea Blackened Death Metal)

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Goatblood – Apparition of Doomsday (Satan at Sea Blackened Death Metal)

  This is the second sea-themed blackened death metal album I've reviewed this past month. Is this a new "thing"? I hope yet pray not. At least here it doesn't matter because it's German DM. Something needs to pick up all that slack from the power metal front, ugh. Goatblood have been bleeding out a […]

GrooVenoM – Wir müssen reden (Lol Trancebore)

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GrooVenoM – Wir müssen reden (Lol Trancebore)

  Sure formula for destruction is core + anything else. See that core? It will, lol, bore. Metalcore, deathcore, anycore, shed a tear for the human race, and then jump off a bridge. Imagine my suicidal thoughts when I saw this particular German troupe in the promos, who annoyingly spell their name with only some […]

Taina – Seelenfresser (Industrial Metal Still Tries Lol)

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Taina – Seelenfresser (Industrial Metal Still Tries Lol)

  I should have known before I started. Taina, I'm sorry, Seelenfresser was set to sprint, but it tripped immediately, shaken by the poof of the starting pistol. The 1990s are gone, friends, though we still worship them when we forget. What we tend to forget is the parts we actually aren't nostalgic for at all. Here's a […]

Schrat – Alptraumgänger (Wow 100% German Black Metal)

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Schrat – Alptraumgänger (Wow 100% German Black Metal)

  Man, great art, yeah, love Misanthropic Art. And this is one of the more clever RPG terms-turned-band-name I've seen. WTF you talking about, asks the band. The closest translation in English we have of Schrat is "bugbear," you know, that thing from Dungeons & Dragons? Yeah, I get it, it's old folklore and such, but […]

Victorius – Dinosaur Warfare Legend of the Powersaurus (Seriousaurus)

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Victorius – Dinosaur Warfare Legend of the Powersaurus (Seriousaurus)

I joked about this one on Facebook when I posted one of the band's promo photos. Some of you thought it was a meme I created, but it was not. And this critical review, too, is real. Victorius is one of several German bands over the past year that have left me disappointed, but this […]

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