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Vacant Eyes – A Somber Preclusion of Being (Turgid Funeral Doom)

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Vacant Eyes – A Somber Preclusion of Being (Turgid Funeral Doom)

  Oh I fooled you with the subtitle of this review lol. Hey, since Vacant Eyes were being wordy, I figured I’d be wordy, even though what our subtitle today implies is their wordiness is a defect. That’s just like a joke man. In fact, it’s all in good praise. A Somber Preclusion of Being […]

Atramentus – Stygian (Reminder, Funeral Doom is Good)

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Atramentus – Stygian (Reminder, Funeral Doom is Good)

  This came at the perfect time because I feel like I needed a reminder that funeral doom can be good. Well, maybe the reminder is more for you actually, cause like I knew that shit already. And this reminder (for you) is being brought to us today by Atramentus, who come from some unspecified […]

Convocation – Ashes Coalesce (Weight of the World Funeral Doom)

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Convocation – Ashes Coalesce (Weight of the World Funeral Doom)

  So yeah yet again I’m convinced that this type of doom needs to hit with everything it’s got. You want a funeral, make it sound like one without the silliness. The slowness, the trudging steps, the abject suffering. It has to hit and hit well to succeed. Slow itself is not enough. It needs […]

Oblivion Gate – Wisdom of the Grave (Yay I’m Depressed Now Funeral Doom)

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Oblivion Gate – Wisdom of the Grave (Yay I’m Depressed Now Funeral Doom)

  How long’s it been since I covered doom of the funeral variety? A quick search reveals it was either two months or two years. Anyway, here’s some more, though Finland’s Oblivion Gate is yet another band I’ve covered this past month that defies a clear definition. “Doom” does not really suffice, nor does “funeral.” […]

Worm – Gloomlord (Soul-Sloughing Doom)

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Worm – Gloomlord (Soul-Sloughing Doom)

  You know you’re in for something different with this cover; it’s one of those that makes your eyes wander for hours until the details wrap around your head and constrict. Worm avoid all popularity. Their presence is thin at most and hidden in Internet fog, and more importantly their music’s a miasma that oozes […]

Woebegone Obscured – The Forestroamer (So EPIC It Goddamn Hurts)

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Woebegone Obscured – The Forestroamer (So EPIC It Goddamn Hurts)

  Just look at that goddamn sick cover. Man, I don’t know what in the world a forestroamer is, but I want to be one. I want to be one with the nature and the trees with moss dripping all from me. The artist, Artem Demura, aka Stargrave, was the perfect fit for Woebegone Obscured, […]

Malsanctum – S/T (Two Minutes to Funeral Doom’s Funeral)

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Malsanctum – S/T (Two Minutes to Funeral Doom’s Funeral)

  Well, here it is, likely the first time something from Iron Bonehead Productions actually depresses me in the other way. I prefer the “why does the human race exist?” type of depression, but this is more of a “why was this album released?” sadness. Now, please pause, for I have already started this on an […]

Interview with Sea Witch (No Band Photos, They Are a Force Not a Band)

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Interview with Sea Witch (No Band Photos, They Are a Force Not a Band)

Doom metal.  A genre that’s really getting on our nerves anymore.  Too little variety, too much cut-and-paste aesthetic, too much simplicity, too much too much too much.  We panned one of those bands not so long ago, yet another doing the same old thing but somehow riding fame for that very reason.  But there are […]

CASSETTE ASSAULT – Speed it Up, Slow it Down!

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CASSETTE ASSAULT – Speed it Up, Slow it Down!

Yes, you are correct, it’s that time again.  Time to pull out the altar that is your tape deck, whatever its size, whatever its age, though we prefer original hardware.  In fact, you know what, you’re out of the cult if you don’t have a deck from the 1980s, so check it right now.  Good? […]

Lychgate – An Antidote for the Glass Pill

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Lychgate – An Antidote for the Glass Pill

Gawd we really needed something new, something unique, something spectacularly bizarre.  Open the curtains, lead us into a crypt musically, scribe before us with aural might a portrait of the macabre.  We seek to be transported through dark corridors dripping in mildew, to smell the dried marrow of ages of death under our feet, oh […]

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