Silver Chains (Laundromat of the Haunted House Genre)

 

Ladies and germs, I braced myself for some spook-ful frights and gorged on all the mental asylum and haunted house games that succeeded before indie developer Cracked Heads released their demonic puzzle/exploration Silver Chains. Unfortunately, from the moment protagonist “Peter” totaled his bush bomb of a car into a tree and was met by an eerie manor with a vibe of cliché horror, I knew I played this game a bajillion times previously. Desiring to test my initial thoughts as I roamed through the “totally like not haunted at all” manor, I tried to convince myself it was the diamond in the rough that would break an entire genre. It’s good, but my total excitement and curiosity levels were as fruitful as the games very short play time.

   

I love my old, violent, twisted granny’s as much as my serial killer ventriloquist dolls in horror games. Considering my disgusting taste in underground filth, there’s no wonder this game sparked a flame of hope. But the scares you’ll find are mediocre at best, creating a more forgettable experience if anything; pretty much just a few jumps and extremely simple chases that usually end with you hiding in a closet. I’m sure there was one part of the game with that whole repeating hallway thing, which was cool when Scooby-Doo did it a very long time ago, making the scariest part of this game the occasional ear-rape. If we forget the boring, eye-clawing gameplay you will find some positives: a great atmosphere, exploration, crisp graphics, Ouija boards, one part where you play a piano for 30 seconds and a pair of shoes, because you’re going to do a lot of walking; very, very slow walking. Peter seriously has the sprinting capacity of a 60-year-old crippled man.  What’s with this trope of characters literally never running like they’re getting chased by a demonic skulled creature the height of a basketball player? Look, if you’re a fan of games like Luigi’s Mansion you might find a bit of solace here, just stop paying too much for the same game.

 

Silver Chains Official Steam Page

Written by The Moore of Babylon

Silver Chains
Cracked Heads Games (developer), Headup (publisher)
3.3 / 5