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Stories written by Stanley, Devourer of Souls
San Kazakgascar: Drought Times EP

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San Kazakgascar: Drought Times EP

Bollywood, something we could probably get into around here, but sadly have yet to do it.  Hey, blame all the music we’re constantly swarmed with, as well as the habit, for some of us at least, of playing too many old school games for no good reason.  There’s only so much in this life one […]

Vortech: Devoid of Life

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Vortech: Devoid of Life

These guys, at the time of the writing of this review, have one of the goofiest Facebook header images ever.  So goofy and poorly shooped it looks like a fan page you hope no one notices.  Unfortunately, first impressions are usually 95% of the time correct, and it makes us open with phrases that lead […]

Netra: Sørbyen

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Netra: Sørbyen

Why the delay in the Sparrow reviews?  Are those guys a bunch of lazy punks around here or what?  Get with it.  In our defense, blame this album.  Sørbyen is one of the strangest things we’ve ever received, and that’s saying a ton because we’re used to it weird around here.  But Netra has crossed […]

Kause 4 Konflikt: No Better Friend – No Worse Enemy

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Kause 4 Konflikt: No Better Friend – No Worse Enemy

This one looks just plain awful on the surface. It reads like the worst of hardcore with Kottonmouth Kings and Slipknot bringing up the fore to end your life brah, and the band members even have themselves dressed like Mushroomhead or something unspeakable, as a quick internet search reveals.  Suffice to say it looked like […]

No Turning Back: No Regrets

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No Turning Back: No Regrets

Some people have been around too long.  They’ve been around so long they forget how long it’s been, and they still think it’s “back then” when it’s actually “today”.  No Turning Back is the definition of irony.  It wants to suggest it’s been forged in the fires of the future, but it’s actually long-cold steel […]

Incite: All Out War

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Incite: All Out War

This one has “family matters” written all over it, not the show but the phenomenon.  Like, this legitimately was written by the step-son, practically real son, of Max Cavalera, and was produced by Logan Mader, so it has every notable groove metal band ever formed all over it.  And Richie, head of Incite, is seriously […]

Ax: Metal Forest

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Ax: Metal Forest

Cold Spring knows how to send promos, like really, guy always has since we started to branch into noise a few years ago.  Full inserts, real discs, and one-sheets with everything you need to know about the release in question.  Labels and bands could learn a thing or two about that…we’re just throwing that out […]

Kapitan Korsakov: stuff & such

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Kapitan Korsakov: stuff & such

Damn it, not again!  Not again!!!  You see, you look at the poorly Shooped (that means Photoshopped) cover, and you immediately write it off.  “Wow, nice, someone got the free download version of CS or something, that’s nice, next!“, you say to yourself, and come back to it as you get to the bottom of the […]

Bent Left: Fabergé

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Bent Left: Fabergé

Usually we don’t get this type of punk around here, the more classic variety, minus the street, studs, mohawks, and inane, High School political references as they toss vegan zines in your face and demand you stop washing your hair and eat Chik’n Quorn patties.  Bent Left come from Kansas City and have been playing […]

Sloth Herder: Abandon Pop Sensibility

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Sloth Herder: Abandon Pop Sensibility

Funny story about Frederick, MD.  The reviewer who is penning this review here happens to be doing research for a novel partially based on a true story, part of which involves a man shooting his wife through the heart, who was originally from Frederick, like really, that part’s completely true.  After he killed her, and […]