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Crest of Darkness – Evil Messiah

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Crest of Darkness – Evil Messiah

First glancing at this cover, you'll probably giggle.  It sends out black metal signals like the lone captain of a sinking dinghy shooting up flares.  "Look at me, help me, I am here!" he screams into the black night, surrounded by nothing but a sea so vast the chances of anyone seeing his desperation is […]

Autokrator – S/T

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Autokrator – S/T

There are certain people out there giving us a wealth of idiocy to criticize, and it's great because we can still seem creative.  Let it be known that anyone who references Star Wars in a review of any metal band, unless it's a metal band with a focus on Star Wars, is a complete toolbox, […]

Hope Drone – Cloak of Ash

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Hope Drone – Cloak of Ash

I hate kids at libraries. I really do. No, scratch that. I hate the parents of kids at libraries. Why? Cause they can’t fucking control their kid from knocking down a stack of books and then leaving the mess to the librarians to clean up cause we all know a suburban mother of three doesn’t […]

Mefitic – Woes of Mortal Devotion

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Mefitic – Woes of Mortal Devotion

This is such an awesome name for a band, even though it's a spelling variation.  Who cares?  It sounds so Goddamned vile it pleases one to speak it aloud to others.  To what are you listening, friend?  Mefitic.  To which they shirk in horror, knowing only from the staticy bile coming from your ears that […]

Decline of the I – Rebellion

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Decline of the I – Rebellion

You know what's annoying?  Pretentious critics who pull out obscure quotes to verify their grasp of thought.  They must be feared, but remember, the only thing we have to fear is fear itself (John F. Kennedy, 1905).  Now we're not trying to make enemies, but it's been said if you want to make enemies, try […]

Concatenatus – Meditation Through the Inner Vortex

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Concatenatus – Meditation Through the Inner Vortex

Now here's something we needed.  We were kind of in the mood to feel ultra-elitist, to sound like that friend you hate, the one who pulls out dozens of band names you've never heard, all in response to your asking simple questions about a genre or whilst discussing a band.  "I like Belphegor, they're pretty […]

Plebeian Grandstand – Lowgazers

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Plebeian Grandstand – Lowgazers

I've been out of the reviewing game for a long time and it is because of this album. My first few listens deemed this album as just a mess. I couldn't understand why anyone would enjoy it. It felt like a chaotic Japanese public orgy where everything was blurred out or covered in KY (minus the […]

Abusiveness – Bramy Nawii

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Abusiveness – Bramy Nawii

Well this has been a week of Eastern Europe, hasn't it?  In fact, we have a backlog of tons of stuff from the region, especially Poland.  Poland is an interesting bridge, as it were, between the East and the West.  Though Eastern Europe was once considered part of Europe long ago, now it's still considered […]

Chaos Echoes – Transient

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Chaos Echoes – Transient

Now it's time to take things to the level where few can reach.  The hands of most are weak, their joints feeble, they lack the inner strength to pull themselves up from the middle of the giant web of metal into realms of pure chaos.  Upon these upper, silken strands things are much different, all […]

Kratherion – Mantra Lucifer Flagelantes

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Kratherion – Mantra Lucifer Flagelantes

Seems we're on something of a black metal trend here as of late, so why not go further with it?  One of the things we discussed in our last review was the issue of differentiating between classic black metal and the modern post variety.  Yesterday it was the latter, today we step back to the former. […]