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The Gauntlet – Dark Steel and Fire (You’d Probably Call This Diabolic Blackened Rock)

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The Gauntlet – Dark Steel and Fire (You’d Probably Call This Diabolic Blackened Rock)

  We’ve got a real textbook mishmashing of diabolic generalities about this one amongst lesser critics, as expected. “Ominous.” “Haunting.” “Malevolent.” “Satanic party.” Wait, WTF. Satanic party? Do you people even proofread what the hell you’re writing? This is the usual garbage spewed out to describe something like this, which in essence is primitive blackened […]

Nocturnal Departure – Clandestine Theurgy (Corrupted Black Metal)

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Nocturnal Departure – Clandestine Theurgy (Corrupted Black Metal)

  This one surprised me. In many ways it features forms that are quite standard to black metal as a whole, specifically second-wave, yet there are variations that, though they’d at first seem only slightly atypical, are instead strangely unique. Canada’s Nocturnal Departure relies heavily on the old school, but the new school they’re peddling […]

Congealed Putrescence – Within the Ceaseless Murk (Swampy Death Metal)

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Congealed Putrescence – Within the Ceaseless Murk (Swampy Death Metal)

  Here’s another one of these releases, but, hey, I’ll take it. I was going to call it murky death metal, which I did the other day for another release, and which this certainly is, I mean look at the EP’s title! But, since these scumbags are from New Orleans I figured swampy would be […]

Gosudar / Malignant Altar – Split (Murky Death Metal)

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Gosudar / Malignant Altar – Split (Murky Death Metal)

  I basically loathe splits. Good stuff, sometimes, but it’s like just save those tracks for a separate release bros. It’s only a thing when bands have B-list drool and they’re like “how can we release this?” “Oh, yeah, a split!” And, in most cases, you don’t mind listening to it, but will you remember […]

Qrixkuor – Zoetrope (Occult Death Metal for Chaotic Connoisseurs)

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Qrixkuor – Zoetrope (Occult Death Metal for Chaotic Connoisseurs)

  I see one long track as an album or EP and I’m like yeah this shit’s going to have something to say. And yes, Qrixkuor is such a band and this is such an album, or rather EP. More of an experience perhaps, or just a long ass song even, Zoetrope is a spinning […]

Hammers of Misfortune – Overtaker (Experimental Prog Metal to Please the Pretentious)

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Hammers of Misfortune – Overtaker (Experimental Prog Metal to Please the Pretentious)

  This was so good I cried even. Okay, maybe not that, but damn. But, first, we got some tags to get out of the way to show you how good this is because by definition it shouldn’t have been at all. We got progressive metal, we got old school thrash, we got nwobhm-styled ramblings, […]

Der Trauerschwan – Sanguinare Vampiris (Vampiric Blackened Doom Metal)

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Der Trauerschwan – Sanguinare Vampiris (Vampiric Blackened Doom Metal)

  Albums can still sometimes surprise me. I mean how many bands trying to creep have used black and white graveyard shots for their covers? I don’t even want to know. But there was something different about this one. Something delicate and subtle. But, then again, hold up, we got vampire shit going on here […]

Jade – The Pacification of Death (Good Old Atmospheric Death Metal)

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Jade – The Pacification of Death (Good Old Atmospheric Death Metal)

  Dang I forgot to review this before I went on a little old trip. Oh well, it still deserves it then or now so I’ll ignore my usual rule of rarely review after release date for good old Jade. What a bunch of good old guys, playing that atmospheric death metal that makes me […]

Eskhaton – Horracle (Nihilistic Death Metal)

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Eskhaton – Horracle (Nihilistic Death Metal)

  Holy…mahgucking…sheissefreide… I mean how else do I start this review? Never before has an EP assaulted me in such a way and satisfied so many dark desires in only five tracks. I usually see them thin-tracked promos and think ugggghhhh but I always give them a quick go. This was not a quick go. […]

Kamra – Cerebral Alchemy (Dismal Atmospheric Black Metal)

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Kamra – Cerebral Alchemy (Dismal Atmospheric Black Metal)

  You ever feel like you have an ouroboros weaving through like your skull but upside-down? And like there are bells in your eye sockets? And like they’re hanging on a stick in a misty forest? Then holy shit this is exactly what you’re looking at above! Damn! As stupid as I made that all […]