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Butcher ABC – North of Hell (ABCs of Goregrind)

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Butcher ABC – North of Hell (ABCs of Goregrind)

  I know I've heard of this Japanese grind machine before, this Butcher ABC, I just can't remember where. Then again, there are a ton of bands in Japan just like this, but this particular gathering of grind maniacs is one of the oldest. They've been around for almost 25 years now, and that's an amazing […]

Vanhelga – Fredagsmys (Black Metalcholy)

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Vanhelga – Fredagsmys (Black Metalcholy)

  Yeah this Swedish outfit has has got me crying. The sound of it turns the most pleasant disposition into a soiled, soggy mess. Plus I'm pretty depressed I haven't heard much of Vanhelga before this moment. The name seems as though it's somewhere in the mists of my memories, but it's but a whisper too […]

Altar of Perversion – Intra Naos (Biblical Black Metal)

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Altar of Perversion – Intra Naos (Biblical Black Metal)

  Jesus Son of God and the Holy Virgin with the Spirit be praised. See that cool harpy angel by Denis Forkas Kostromitin? I don't have a lead for that, so just get ready to open those Old and New Testaments, because Italy's Altar of Perversion are here to write a fooking Bible. You think I'm […]

Lychgate – The Contagion in Nine Steps (Scholarly Metal)

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Lychgate – The Contagion in Nine Steps (Scholarly Metal)

  Nice, that cover by the totally unknown Michael Guy is the perfect lead-in because I've been waiting to use the word 'scholarly' in reference to metal so I can feel like I'm above everyone else. Actually I already have presented myself as such, but this makes it official, and I should get an honorary […]

Horns of Fear (Old School Horror Puzzle Freak Out)

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Horns of Fear (Old School Horror Puzzle Freak Out)

  Boy do I ever remember games like this. When my family finally got a legit computer in the early 1990s, the first game I played on it was The 7th Guest, which you likely know. I won't even bother linking it because you're a total provincial if you don't know about it. Suffice to say, if the […]

Abjection Ritual – Soul of Ruin, Body of Filth (Industrial of Blah)

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Abjection Ritual – Soul of Ruin, Body of Filth (Industrial of Blah)

  This is one of those releases I give multiple listens to, because once or even thrice is simply not enough. Not because I'm so below it, I simply need to allow my mind time to decide whether or not it deserves 'canon' status. Answer: this does not. Usually when I start like that it […]

Our Place of Worship is Silence – With Inexorable Suffering (Already Out of Space)

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Our Place of Worship is Silence – With Inexorable Suffering (Already Out of Space)

  You know when the band's name and album title have taken up nearly your entire post title and take more than a minute to write it's not going to be good. It just reeks of that sticky, foul kind of pretentiousness that ruins far too many bands. Note to those who dare tread this path, if […]

Schrat – Alptraumgänger (Wow 100% German Black Metal)

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Schrat – Alptraumgänger (Wow 100% German Black Metal)

  Man, great art, yeah, love Misanthropic Art. And this is one of the more clever RPG terms-turned-band-name I've seen. WTF you talking about, asks the band. The closest translation in English we have of Schrat is "bugbear," you know, that thing from Dungeons & Dragons? Yeah, I get it, it's old folklore and such, but […]

Reverorum ib Malacht – Im Ra Distare (STFU Title’s Too Long)

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Reverorum ib Malacht – Im Ra Distare (STFU Title’s Too Long)

  I'm, so sick of the hype surrounding this album and I'm going to be as brief as possible, but trust me, it's goddamn hard not to go off. Practically the only reason I'm reviewing it is because people just can't STFU about it. I don't even really like the cover. Oh, wow, some anti-Christian […]

Inisans – Transition (F It Metal)

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Inisans – Transition (F It Metal)

  I have no idea what in the world Inisans means, and I don't care. Don't bother searching, either, because nothing will help you, trust me. I have skills man, don't bother I did it already. So I don't care, there's no reason to care, and Google can F off about asking me whether I meant […]